little did I know...

It's been almost 2 years, and I think I'm finally ready to tell this story. For a while, I was too embarrassed. Is your interest peaked yet? ha.

It was my first trip to Uganda, first trip to Africa, first everything - I don't know a whole lot now, but I knew even less then. The farthest I had ever gone was Spain, so after two 8-hour flights and a layover in Amsterdam - by the time I arrived, I had no idea which way was forward or backward. There was a driver waiting for me at the airport (an intimidating experience if you've ever been looking for someone who just wasn't there - do I really trust any of these people to take me to where I'm supposed to go?), and he drove me to the Imperial Beach resort. Little did I know there were two Imperial Beach resorts, and he took me to the wrong one! Whatever, I didn't care - there was a bed, and got up to my room and unpacked - still totally overwhelmed by the smells and total darkness. I knew I couldn't go straight to sleep because I was waiting for Hashim (name changed for privacy) to drop off my phone. Hashim had been our driver since the beginning of the program 6 months prior, and I'd spoken with him over the phone many times before. After a couple hours, he finally showed up - explained that I went to the wrong hotel and he had been waiting for me there. Oops. I was too tired and confused to really care. He gave me a phone and told me he'd pick me up the next day to head up to Gulu. We drove the 5 hours in almost total silence, since I was looking out the windows, and he was focused on not hitting any chickens in the road. From that time through the rest of my stay in Gulu, Hashim was back in Kampala - but he'd call every once in a while to make sure I was ok.

Well, it was time for me to go home for Christmas - I'd been running the 30 person office, managing millions of dollars, buying crazy things, and I think this was the craziest learning experience I've ever had. Big John (another driver) took me back to Kampala, and Hashim was supposed to drive me to the airport the next day (mind you, this whole time I had never spent more than 12 hours in the big city - that's for another post). Hashim told me he had a gift for me. He handed me a box the size & shape of a dvd, covered in shimmery-red-hearts wrapping paper plus a card. I wasn't sure what to do - but for some idiotic reason, I thought the best thing would be to open it right there in front of him. Don't ask me why.

I opened the package to find............... a dvd-size plastic box containing black lace lingerie. The box said something like 'Petal soft and ever fresh' and had a picture (of course) of some hot african mama wearing the babydoll & thong. But the best part is the size of the items he got me: SUPER XXXL. Triple Extra Large. triple. I've never been so dumbfounded in my life. In case you were wondering this is not a typical gift between acquaintances in America. I think I said something like, 'Oh you really shouldn't have.' and escaped the car as fast as I possibly could.

So, there you have it - my introduction to the ways of African men and their expressiveness to mzungu girls. To answer your inevitable questions - NO, I never wore the lingerie. But I think I still have it somewhere - it's too funny to let go.