Isn't this one of the hardest things to do? I won't get into all the crazy high-school-esq awkwardness of making friends - but let me just say that making friends in a place like Juba is tough. You have 4 basic categories:
1. the Lifers. This is the top echelon - they've been here through the hard times, and have earned the right to hang out in the good times too. These folks are there for at least 12 months or more, and they have seen LOADS of people come and go. They are jaded, and they have gotten over it just enough to stay here indefinitely. They know everything (they may even tell you some of what they know, so listen closely), and they deserve respect. Yesterday, I met someone who said she will stay in Juba forever. I *almost hugged her on the spot, and I did in fact ask if I could be her friend.
2. the Don't Bothers. These folks are here for 2-4 weeks, and they're not coming back. Don't bother trying to get to know them - they are loud and looking for a good time. They'll definitely show up at the Saturday party, make out with the dude we all know you shouldn't make out with, and then be gone in the next week. Their names are probably Joey or Jenny or Bill or Britt. Something American that you'll never remember. these people are the reason I don't remember small details.
3. the Middies. These people are here for 6 months or so, and can't wait to tell you everything they know about Juba (or wherever)... These storytellers talk about their worms, their trips to the field and their run-ins with the police, each topping the last person's story with their own. It's possible you could find friends here in this group- the best way is to ask about their life story... obviously.
4. the Scrubs. yes, TLC, said it best, "I don't want no scrub, a scrub is a guy that can't get no love from me..." You may recognize the scrubs from one of these attributes:
-they will try to impress you with a. random knowledge, b. a feat of strength, c. their connections around town, d. their cool motorbike, and always with e. their popularity
-they will be your best friend in a minute- offering free tips, rides, coffee, or where to find fuel tomorrow
-they will have all your information (phone numbers, email address, and skype deets) before you know what hit you
1. the Lifers. This is the top echelon - they've been here through the hard times, and have earned the right to hang out in the good times too. These folks are there for at least 12 months or more, and they have seen LOADS of people come and go. They are jaded, and they have gotten over it just enough to stay here indefinitely. They know everything (they may even tell you some of what they know, so listen closely), and they deserve respect. Yesterday, I met someone who said she will stay in Juba forever. I *almost hugged her on the spot, and I did in fact ask if I could be her friend.
2. the Don't Bothers. These folks are here for 2-4 weeks, and they're not coming back. Don't bother trying to get to know them - they are loud and looking for a good time. They'll definitely show up at the Saturday party, make out with the dude we all know you shouldn't make out with, and then be gone in the next week. Their names are probably Joey or Jenny or Bill or Britt. Something American that you'll never remember. these people are the reason I don't remember small details.
3. the Middies. These people are here for 6 months or so, and can't wait to tell you everything they know about Juba (or wherever)... These storytellers talk about their worms, their trips to the field and their run-ins with the police, each topping the last person's story with their own. It's possible you could find friends here in this group- the best way is to ask about their life story... obviously.
4. the Scrubs. yes, TLC, said it best, "I don't want no scrub, a scrub is a guy that can't get no love from me..." You may recognize the scrubs from one of these attributes:
-they will try to impress you with a. random knowledge, b. a feat of strength, c. their connections around town, d. their cool motorbike, and always with e. their popularity
-they will be your best friend in a minute- offering free tips, rides, coffee, or where to find fuel tomorrow
-they will have all your information (phone numbers, email address, and skype deets) before you know what hit you
-and then they'll try to get with you... as if those first three things have earned the right for a shagfest.
it's ok, though, once they realize you're not available or interested - they move on quicker than a mosquito bite to the next new girl in town. just brush 'em off, unless they are seriously persistent - then you can tell them, "You're creeping me out," which normally works.
So, what do you do to make friends? When I asked someone this, he told me: "Find something in common to talk about, invite to booze, follow up." I'll let you know how it goes--
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